It dawned on me the other day that I passed the ten year mark this summer. Though it’s hard to pinpoint exactly when I “became†Pagan, I have chosen the day I cast my first circle as my anniversary. While at the time I was still unsure of what I was doing (and wouldn’t yet have been brave enough to use the word “Paganâ€), that was the moment when the research I’d been doing for years went from theoretical to practical. On that day I challenged my fear of… God’s wrath? Hell? Too much change?… or whatever it was that was holding me back and allowed myself to follow where I believed (and still believe) a higher power was leading me. (You can read more about my conversion in my bio or in my earlier post “Convert and Convict – The Incredible Difference of Two Letters or No, Seriously, They’re Different Words.â€)
A lot changes in ten years.
I remember the beginning when I had more questions than anything else — there was so much to learn! I remember the difficulties of finding teachers who wouldn’t auto-reject the n00b as a fluffy bunny. I remember wondering if it was possible to find a pagan culture that wasn’t goth, yogini, or hippie (don’t get me wrong, I love goths, yoginis, and hippies, and I’ve learned a lot from all three of these groups, but my standard scene is a little more vanilla). I remember being bemused when I learned the differences between British Traditional Wicca (BTW) and Ecclectic… and deciding that Ecclectic was more my scene. I remember my first introduction to the Reconstructionists – mysterious Pagans who were obsessed with old books, attended lots of Ren-Faires, and maybe even sacrificed pigs or something (I wasn’t really sure, but pagans sacrificed pigs 1000 years ago, and Recons emulate a religion from 1000 years ago, so clearly they all sacrifice pigs). I decided to stay away. I remember the fear of coming out for the first time to my husband and close friends and the angst that ensued.
A few years in I started to hit a stride. My husband and friends had come to accept – and sometimes even champion – my decision, and I felt comfortable being more open in public. I had experimented enough that I had started finding ritual formats that worked for me. I had researched pantheons and started conversations with different gods and goddesses to see who I worked best with. GG and I started doing seasonal rituals together, and we found that the ritual, while important, worked more for us a springboard to discuss issues inspired by the seasons and hash over life issues that turned along with The Wheel. I officiated my first Pagan wedding. I attended circles run by various groups around town. I continued reading voraciously online and in published books, trying to learn as much as I could about moral philosophy and conceptions of God – pantheist, hard polytheist, soft polytheist, panentheist, trinitarian, monotheist, atheist – and I experimented with what I found. I learned that, as attractive as magic sounds, I wasn’t interested in being a witch. And somewhere, I realized that Wicca, with its emphasis on formal ritual and tradition based largely on Celtic mythology (which, while gorgeous, is not something I easily connect with), wasn’t the best home for me. So I quit calling myself Wiccan and started calling myself Pagan… just Pagan.
Time continued to turn, and in the past few years I started facing some of my preconceived notions. Notions like my ancestral gods, the Norse pantheon, were all about violence (they’re not). That I would have to butcher my own pork to be a Reconstructionist (I wouldn’t). And that it’s impossible to revere ideas from the past without joining the SCA (while I’ve nothing against the SCA – they are faboo for research – I don’t have the patience to spin my own yarn or hammer my own kettles.) In the past few years I’ve realized that Reconstructionism is not about replicating the past, but about recognizing value in pre-Christian morals and spiritual views – the idea that Christianity, while a legitimate alternative to native spirituality, is not progress from native spirituality. I’m embarrassed to say I didn’t realize how entrenched that belief was (it’s what I was taught my whole life!) until I got heavily involved researching Medieval history for a fiction project. (Hopefully one of these days that book will be published and I can share it with you!) With that discovery, researching not just mythology but cultural history became a part of my pagan journey. I set up my first ancestral altar and tried calling on the gods of my ancestors. I started looking at the amazing commonalities among native faiths from all over the globe, like ancestor worship, polytheism, the idea of a “Great Spirit†or nature as an “over-god†and many others. Eventually I realized that those crazy, animal-sacrificing Ren-Faire folk (who don’t necessarily sacrifice animals nor attend Ren-Faires) was where I belonged.*
I’ve learned so much in ten years. Changed so much in ten years. The main thing I’ve come to understand, however trite it may be, is how much I don’t know. I plan on continuing to learn, to change, and to grow over the next decade. One piece of my Pagan journey I’ve absolutely loved is starting the Pagan Princesses where I can share my thoughts and read what other people have to say, and I look forward to our community growing in the future! (Expansion of the realm?)
How long have you been Pagan (if you’re Pagan, that is)? What are some of the biggest changes you’ve made or things you’ve learned since you’ve been Pagan or been hanging with Pagans?
* In case you can’t tell, I like harassing my peeps.
+ Featured image:Â Neopagan meditation in Rocca di Cerere by Dedda71
10 comments
B says:
Jul 20, 2011
What a wonderful post! Blessings to you as you mark this milestone in your life, and may you find joy in many more decades of honest religion. 🙂
(hugs!)
Jax says:
Jul 20, 2011
Aw, thanks B! 🙂 It kinda took me by surprise to realize I’d been around the Pagan realm this long!
Devin says:
Jul 20, 2011
I am Heathen/Asatrur and have been going on 2 years with my “anniversary in September, though I have always considered myself Pagan.
Jax says:
Jul 20, 2011
Wow! Lifetime Pagan; that’s cool. I don’t know many of those. I’ll have my first “Heathen Anniversary” in September (I posted about a Year of Living Heathen last Fall Equinox – “Meet Me on the Equinox”) and I’m definitely going to stick around longer! 🙂
T.K. says:
Jul 21, 2011
I am not Pegan, but find your experiences and explanations fascinating. Congratulations on your tenth anniversary. Your devotion seem only growing with change.
Jax says:
Jul 25, 2011
Aw, thanks for following along T.K! I always enjoy reading what you have to say (and your kick ass poetry!!)
Kristina says:
Jul 25, 2011
I’ve been reading about paganism for several years. My mother bought me my first book on dream magic when I was 14 (I think?). But I’ve been doing rituals (trying to anyway) for almost two years now. I was baptized Mormon, but when they got divorced and we moved out of state with my mother, we fell out of touch with the church. We went back a handful of times, but eventually my life was pretty much religion-free. That first book on dream magic started my journey, although I’ve believed in magic ever since I saw fairies when I was very young.
Jax says:
Jul 25, 2011
Oh wow, Kristina, that’s cool. I too have seen enough evidence in my life that I can’t not believe in magic. 🙂 And one of my best friends in high school was Mormon. I went to church with her several times; really nice people.
Not tomorrow but next week (8/2) I’m reviewing a book written by a friend of mine on interpreting dreams; I’d love to hear your comments on that as you have experience in dream work!
D'har says:
Mar 8, 2012
Hello, I want to start off by saying I just discovered your blog a little bit ago while googling Freya and everything about her (I think it was a search on Brisingamen that brought me here), and have been enjoying your articles very much!
I started calling myself a Pagan when I was a smart-assed kid who cared more about making people uncomfortable than identifying with a religon. Wicca was the only pagan group I had any contact with for a long time, but I just couldn’t take them seriously- probably because every one I met took themselves too seriously! (No offence intended to Wiccans- I have met lovely ones since!)I had always been drawn towards the Norse gods and myths, but figured that was just Tolkien’s influence. I spent most of my 20s in a skeptical, vauge, and spiritually blase state. After a while, the idea that anything is possible, therefore I won’t commit to one thing just left me, well, unfulfilled. So I’ve been looking for the one thing that’s right for me to commit to. Now, I have a child to consider, and am trying to find a way to make spritual practice a normal part of his life, while still teaching him to think on his own!
I’ve recently discovered modern Heathenry and all the different aspects thereof- thanks in no small part to your blog and all the resources you offer! It’s so nice to see proof of other people going through a similar journey as me.
I don’t know that I’m committed to Heathenry, but I am committed to Freya for the next year, in conjunction with 7 other women who have committed to 7 other goddesses also. All part of a nifty class put together by a shamanic practitioner.
OK that’s enough rambling for a post comment! Thanks for all your hard work.
Jax says:
Mar 8, 2012
Wow, D’Har, thanks! GG and I have really enjoyed writing about our Pagan journeys and not-so-humble opinions on matters touching the Pagan world, but my favorite thing about being a Princess has been hearing from other people with so many cool stories to share! It is reaffirming to hear the different (and similar) paths so many other people have gone on. I wish you the best as you work with Freya for a year (that’s how Heathenry started for me, with a test drive year!) and hope you find, in this or in something else, that fulfillment you’re searching for. I know it’s been a wonderful homecoming for me to become Heathen.
Welcome to the site, and we hope to hear more from you!!